Before You Learn to Communicate Better, Try Coming Home to Yourself
Unlock your leadership potential by enhancing self-awareness, leading to better communication, decision-making, and team trust.

Want to communicate better as a leader? Start by understanding yourself first. Research shows that self-awareness improves workplace performance, relationships, and decision-making. Yet, only 10%-15% of people are truly self-aware. Here's why self-knowledge is essential for leadership and how to build it:
- Why Self-Awareness Matters: It helps leaders make better decisions, manage emotions, and communicate authentically.
- Daily Habits to Build Self-Awareness:
- Morning reflection or meditation
- Journalling emotional responses and communication patterns
- Evening assessment of daily interactions
- Ask for Feedback: Gain insights into your leadership style by asking direct, constructive questions.
- Define Your Core Values: Create a short leadership statement to align your decisions and communication with your values.
When leaders know themselves better, they build trust, deliver clearer messages, and foster open team discussions. Start with self-reflection, act on feedback, and lead with authenticity.
Self Leadership Skills: Why Self Awareness Is Important for ...
The Core Issue: Know Yourself First
Self-awareness is a cornerstone of strong leadership communication, yet it's often overlooked in daily routines. A simple habit of self-review can help reinforce this essential skill.
Daily Self-Review for Better Leadership
Building self-awareness takes consistent effort. Clinical Assistant Professor Robert Hughes highlights its importance:
"Every journey starts with a map. For leaders, it's a mental map - one that helps them understand where they've been, where they are, and where they want to be."
To create this mental map, consider these daily practices:
- Morning reflection: Spend 15 minutes in meditation to focus your thoughts and prepare for the day ahead.
- Daily journalling: Use a journal to reflect on:
- Emotional responses to difficult situations
- Communication habits
- Moments of confidence or uncertainty
- How your decisions impacted team dynamics
This habit helps you identify patterns and make informed leadership choices.
- Evening assessment: At the end of the day, review your interactions and decisions, noting areas where your communication improved or fell short.
Self-Knowledge Builds Leadership Impact
Understanding your strengths and weaknesses has a direct effect on your leadership abilities. Jean Dahl, Senior Executive and Lean Mindset Expert, explains:
"Before you can lead others, you must be able to lead yourself."
This self-awareness enhances various aspects of leadership:
Area of Impact | How Self-Knowledge Helps |
---|---|
Decision-making | Identifies personal biases that could affect choices |
Team dynamics | Shows how your mood influences team behaviour |
Communication style | Enables consistent and genuine messaging |
Personal growth | Focuses development on areas needing improvement |
Tasha Eurich's research backs this up: "When we see ourselves clearly, we are more confident and more creative. We make sounder decisions, build stronger relationships, and communicate more effectively".
Honest self-reflection is key. These insights lay the groundwork for taking actionable steps to deepen self-awareness.
3 Steps to Better Self-Understanding
Building on the foundation of self-awareness, here are three actionable steps to deepen your understanding of yourself.
Start a Self-Review Routine
Dedicate time each day to reflect on your interactions and evaluate how your emotions influence your decisions. Keeping a journal can help you track patterns in your communication, emotions, decisions, and teamwork.
Once you’ve identified your internal behaviours, seek external perspectives to gain a fuller understanding.
Ask for Direct Feedback
Getting feedback from others is key to understanding your leadership style and its impact. As James Clear puts it:
"Feedback loops are the invisible forces that shape human behavior."
Ask specific, constructive questions, such as:
- "How am I doing?"
- "What could I do differently to improve?"
- "How do my communications affect the team?"
Tasha Eurich highlights the importance of this process:
"Unless we are clear about who we truly are, what we value, what difference we seek to make and how the world sees us and our work, we cannot be effective leaders."
Define Your Values and Message
With your personal reflections and external feedback combined, focus on clarifying your core values. Write a concise leadership statement, 3-5 sentences long, that captures your values and approach. For instance:
"As a leader, I am collaborative, empowering, open and decisive. I believe in the power of teams and leveraging everyone's expertise and talents. I'm completely comfortable not being the expert in the room. I have strong values and will always do what's right."
Let this statement serve as a guide to ensure your daily actions align with your values and leadership goals.
Results of Better Self-Understanding
Stronger Team Trust
Leaders who develop a deeper understanding of themselves tend to build stronger trust within their teams. Organisational psychologist Tasha Eurich highlights that self-aware leaders form better relationships with their team members. This connection comes from their ability to recognise and acknowledge both their strengths and limitations.
By being genuine in their interactions, self-aware leaders encourage their teams to openly share challenges and concerns. This transparency creates a cycle where honest communication becomes standard practice, leading to clearer and more effective collaboration.
Improved Message Delivery
Knowing themselves better helps leaders communicate in a way that feels genuine and impactful. By recognising their communication style and understanding how it affects others, they can adjust their approach to resonate with their audience. A self-aware leader blends awareness, flexibility, and authenticity to ensure their messages align with both the team’s needs and their leadership values.
Encouraging Open Team Discussions
Effective communication sets the stage for open dialogue within a team. Leaders who are comfortable with their own vulnerabilities and invite feedback create an atmosphere where team members feel safe to share ideas. Michael McKinney from LeadershipNow explains this well:
"Self-awareness provides the opportunity for us to close the gap between who we think we are or want to be and who we actually are at a particular point in time. But that can only be achieved with feedback of some kind".
Self-aware leaders actively:
- Invite constructive feedback
- Recognise their own areas for growth
- Foster a sense of psychological safety for team discussions
- Lead by example, showing the behaviour they expect from their team
Teams led by such leaders often report higher satisfaction and a stronger willingness to engage in meaningful discussions.
Conclusion: Self-Knowledge Leads to Better Communication
Effective communication starts with understanding yourself. Organisational psychologist Tasha Eurich highlights that self-aware leaders make better decisions and form stronger relationships, which are the foundation of impactful leadership.
"When we see ourselves clearly, we are more confident and more creative. We make sounder decisions, build stronger relationships, and communicate more effectively. We're less likely to lie, cheat, and steal. We're better workers who get more promotions. And we're more-effective leaders with more-satisfied employees and more-profitable companies."
– Tasha Eurich, PhD, organisational psychologist, researcher, and New York Times bestselling author
To maximise their influence, leaders should focus on three critical areas:
Key Areas for Leaders to Focus On
-
Regular Self-Reflection
Set aside time for self-assessment, track communication habits and outcomes, and pinpoint triggers that affect leadership. -
Using Feedback Effectively
Establish ways to gather feedback, act on team suggestions, and keep an eye on how communication efforts are received. -
Practising Authentic Leadership
Ensure your communication reflects your values, demonstrate openness, and build trust by staying consistent in actions.
"Self-awareness provides the opportunity for us to close the gap between who we think we are or want to be and who we actually are at a particular point in time. But that can only be achieved with feedback of some kind."
FAQs
How does self-awareness enhance my ability to make decisions and communicate effectively as a leader?
Self-awareness is the foundation of effective leadership. By understanding your own strengths, weaknesses, values, and emotions, you can make more thoughtful decisions that align with your goals and principles. This clarity helps you communicate more authentically and confidently, fostering trust and openness with your team.
When you're self-aware, you can also recognise areas where you may need support or collaboration, allowing you to leverage the strengths of others. This not only improves your leadership but also creates a more cohesive and productive environment. Ultimately, self-awareness enables you to lead with purpose and authenticity, which are essential for building meaningful connections and achieving success.
How can I build self-reflection and feedback into my daily routine to improve my leadership skills?
Incorporating self-reflection and feedback into your daily routine is essential for personal growth and effective leadership. Start by setting aside 10 minutes a day to reflect on your experiences. This could involve journaling, taking a quiet walk, or simply sitting in contemplation. Ask yourself questions like: What went well today? and What could I do differently next time?
To make feedback a regular part of your routine, seek input from trusted colleagues or mentors. Be open to constructive criticism and use it to identify areas for improvement. Regularly review your progress and adjust your approach to keep your self-development journey engaging and meaningful.
Remember, leadership starts with self-awareness. By committing to small, consistent actions, you’ll cultivate the insight and adaptability needed to lead effectively.
Why is it important to define my core values and create a personal leadership statement, and how does this impact my effectiveness as a leader?
Defining your core values and crafting a personal leadership statement is essential because it helps you lead with authenticity and clarity. Your core values act as a compass, guiding your decisions and actions, while a leadership statement reflects your purpose, approach, and vision as a leader.
When you are clear about your values and leadership philosophy, you build trust, stay focused on your goals, and inspire others with consistency. This self-awareness not only strengthens your credibility but also helps you navigate challenges with confidence and integrity, fostering meaningful connections with your team.